Maybe today is a day when I should count my blessing for I don't feel too good or happy.

I know many of us go through this phase once in a while, I do too..for me its rare but when it does its bad..and I am hating it today. Its not like there is some drastic change that has come in the last 24 hours..nothing out of the ordinary has really happened, but its just that sometimes one compares things and finds oneself feeling low.

It is not the best of ways to go around the world comparing oneself, I would say this to everyone and anyone on any given day but today I am judging myself and feeling bad in the process..I know that its just a moment's weakness and will go away without haunting me for long..maybe a hot shower will fix it too but I want to feel it and let go of it. So here I am being honest, I know somepeople might feel concerned reading this but hey you all..I am fine and I am fine because of you guys who form my life :)

There! a small smile escaped..and hopefully it will grow longer/bigger ??..Sheesh I can never be too sad, I seem to find it funny..and laugh even as I cry. My Mom and sis have always marveled at this and maybe this is what will help me today.

Till a better feeling prompts me to post, see ya.

I am so confused about how I love rain !! I am the kind who loves when it rains once in a while, like it should, in its due time of the year and then it should come in a big downpour..and not just drizzle and make me and my day dull.

I am a self confessed sunshine gurl :) Nothing beats the mornings when sunrays wake you up and passes its bouncy energy into lazy limbs; Its the kind which makes me sing and whistle the whole day long..I love rain too, feel specially blessed when it rains on my mid summer birthday, but lately I have been caught in a loong drizzle of rain with hardly any sunshine :(

B'lore being itself made y'day possible! We had chai and pakode(bhajji/fritters) at 10 in the night..No kidding ! It has been raining and the OH has been so caught up with work that I finally decided to complete my rainy day ritual even if that meant dinner post midnight :D This is the only thing I love about rain..having someone special to share it with and hot tea and pakode. Its a shame how we have to miss out on it on most times because yes! it just rains too much !!

The OH being a Mallu is used to these long spells of rains and survives it pretty happily while I shudder at all times and cry out 'Its going to rain' EVERYtime we go out!

Okay, so now that I have let my steam out, I do have some fun memories of rain too. We were camping in Canada, and had to set up tents,being total novice at it the bones(!)of the tent kept coming to pieces and it took some time for us to fix it right. It was past noon and while both the tents were just up it started raining with big drops pattering away!! We flung all things within reach under a huge tarp(aulin) and ducked into our tents. That rush of blood at having been able to put up a sturdy tent and the two of us huddled under the tent while it rained and rained. We felt so lucky and so blessed to be together, the rain sliding down the tent as we huddled in the middle. There is something truly unique about sharing space under a tent..its close confinement makes for great fun and romance and we loved every bit of it...

The rain cleared the sky and it set the mood for all of us. Two little girls running around and the four adults shaking their heads at how lucky they had been :) That is a great memory !! And I love to think of it, to relive it, so with a little grudge I say..rain is not all that bad and I DO love it too :)

I just came over from Mad Momma and saw something there that took me back to my childhood. 'Gullak' is where we used to save and thrift away coins and just coins with an odd 'note' once in a while. Now those who have not collected in a gullak would not know the joy and fun of picking it up and jiggling it and feeling how heavy it is..its all about being patient, thinking and rethinking of new ways to spend the money while the pile inside it slowly rises till one can see the silver glint from above.

We had one going at all times during my childhood and even now during my recent vacation I spied one in the shape of a gas cylinder where my mom pops in the occasional 'change'. There was another bigger and prettier one in the shape of a golden yellow mango which was unused for who would like to break such a beautiful piece of artistry.But a piggy bank can never compare to 'gullak' and the fun there is in choosing who would break it; the place where it should be smashed lest the coins go scurrying away into hiding and then wait with anticipation as it gets smashed and grab all the coins as it rolls around.

The ritual continues with sorting the denomination and building towers, finally the total amount and the gullak ends up in our garden smashed into pieces. I remember sometimes we would pick up a piece and pour water over it and take in the aroma !

The OH got a lesson in family history this vacation as my father brought out our trusted old red winding clock and showed him with pride, and my mother told in all emotions how proudly we had bought it from our first 'gullak' money..those were the times when salaries used to be in hundreds. That clock has seen us through a lot of time and still keeps going faithfully.

Of late I have given up on collecting in a gullak but I shall start anew and keep the tradition going of the charm and ingenious of our good old gullak.

I feel so proud of India..

I was watching the recap of all the major events that the 62 years old India has witnessed on a Tv channel..its not always that we look at the ugly side, the scarred face of our India..or in some ways we do see it ever so often that there is a certain apathy towards it..but to see it all in a brief one hour through the eyes that had witnessed those events unfolding..the narrative that does not need to search for words to express the feeling that they felt, the memory and the echo being so strong that it almost takes us to those times when we were not even aware of the events unfolding..

It was so good to see the DD newsreaders recall how they would use the simplest and the mildest way of describing the events that had shook the psyche of India. The operation Blue Star, the assassination of Indira Gandhi..how Salma Sultana (one with rose in her hair) recalled that even though she was required to present the news without getting emotional yet she knew her face expressed more than what she was saying. How the then (and even now) favorites of 'ek anek' and 'mile sur' were all based on national integration,of 'ekta mein shakti'.How the Door Darshan director general recalled that the 'mile sur mera tumhara' was the idea of a genius who wanted to show pan views of India from each of the region and found the common thread of 'Raag Bhairavi' which is omnipresent in all styles of music (Hindustani and Karnatic)and made it an evergreen childhood memory for millions of us.

I am sure most of us would remember exactly where we were when the news of Rajiv Gandhi's assassination came with the dawn,I remember how coins with Rajiv Gandhi's image were so treasured by many.

I saw the footage of Indira Gandhi asking Rakesh Sharma how did India look like from there and the immortal reply 'Sara Jahan se accha Hindustan hamara'. Saw the green revolution, the white revolution..saw India becoming the power it is today..

Man how proud I am!! I am so proud of being Indian.

But why past..Chhodo kal ki baatein kal ki baat purani..we shall do our part for the new India !



Have you seen Spain rocking to our dhun ?!?! Dont miss this..



Salute to you !!

Its late evening and I am in a mood for a quick fix dinner but I overlook an important detail (eh words !) So I was very carefully peeling away potatoes with a knife for I had done away with the peeler. No not by choice but by chance ;-) Now have any of you heard of anyone throwing away the peeler along with the peels :P I did !!

So..I was concentrating hard at peeling and saving my fingers even as RJ Pallavi went on with her superfast kannada which I was barely managing when up went the uproar..and quite literally !!

A kiddo playing in the apartment compound took to shouting his lungs out and some more kids joined in to add to the fun. It broke my concentration alright but not just the howling; It was the memory it evoked from my childhood..I could so clearly see two skinny girls in frocks on the terrace with wind blown hair..one easily shouting her heart out and the other giggling and trying but too embarrassed to do it,to take it to the max. I have never ever been able to shout my heart out. It must feel great and how I envy my sis for having taken the chance then for I wonder when will I get the chance to shout out aloud without a care for propriety and people. Huh ??

I believe there can never be a better gift than a great childhood and a head full of memories. Lately I was regaling my OH (other half) with one of them..and I am sure I could get a hearty laugh out of each of you but then me and my embarrassment, so I shall smile to myself and add another beautiful moment of both of us enjoying my childhood again to my treasure of memories

PS: Anyone for a quick and exotic recipe of chutney aloo ?

So I have been having rather busy weekends and I am loving the busy-ness of it. One of the activities which I do not like to miss out on is going to my kids(@ Ashwini Charitable Trust). I have been taking classes or learning and fun activity for a group of 5-6 year olds from Ulsoor slum..and we were concentrating on the alphabets and weaving stories around them as we went through the whole A, B, C..

The premise was to take up an Alphabet and find a Name with it, an Animal and also a Thing..and make the most funny sentence with it. I stress on funny and imaginative because it makes me happy ;) and also helps kids to think beyond the set ways. Adding to the storymaking we would then get some kids to volunteer to draw the 'name' 'animal' and 'thing' and then potray the story.

Now the really cute and serious part ( I like calling it both) For the alphabet 'J' we chose 'Jackie' 'Jackal ' and 'Jam' I bossed my way to drawing the jar of Jam :-D. Now some of the kids told me that thats not how jam is..its like hmm...wild hand expressions..trying hard to understand..confused..trying hard to explain..and I understood!! (for I am a sucker for ads). He meant the sachet size, which obviously is the smallest pack available and he even wanted me to write Rs 2 for it. Good to know he is observant to have noted such detail. I was put into thinking that these kids from slums would only know jam sachets and not the 60-70 buck bottles which we pick up at all times. So much of the circumstances in which we are brought up leads to our impressions about common things..and its interesting to be able to view things from their perspective too.

Anyways. we had a whole lot of fun and still have some more alphabets to go through..and maybe I can put up some pictures of our crazy drawings and stories to add laughter and smiles too...btw we chose 'lifebuoy soap' for things too and gave a Lion a good bath.. harr harr :P